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CoCreation

April 13, 2025 by admin

“One who sees himself as everything
is fit to be guardian of the world.
One who loves himself as everyone
is fit to be teacher of the world.” Tao Te Ching

We are all co-creators on the stage of life. On one hand, we are trapped in the drama of the planet, and participate in the dysfunction and despair that surrounds us. On the other hand, in our best expression of ourselves, we each uniquely reflect and express the creativity and love at the Source of creation. Free from the entanglement of the drama in our minds, relationships, and culture, we contribute to the wonder and beauty of the canvas we call Life. One way or the other, we participate in the co-creation of an evolving universe.

A Co-Creative Path is a path toward personal, relational, and cultural transformation. Our cultural deficit of community has created the conditions where personal identity and relational needs are primarily shaped by damaged egos and disconnected social conditioning. Rather than being supported to pursue a conscious and heart centered life, we are mostly driven by unconscious and unmet needs that strengthen a false self and false sense of security.

A CoCreative Path is a path of transformation and empowerment at the intersection of Authenticity, Purpose, and Connection. It is about the human condition and our foundational needs. It is a path that starts within, a path of healing and growth through the steps of awareness, transformation, and intention.

A CoCreative Path is a path of empowerment to let go of our attachment to our obvious and nuanced ego identity. It is a path of personal, relational, and cultural transformation as we pursue greater alignment with heart based authenticity, a deepening connection in relationship with others, and a clarity and intention related to a purpose-full direction in our current stage of life.

A CoCreative Path is a path of radical responsibility. It is a road less traveled, a scenic byway that takes us off the highway of the Drama Triangle to shift our focus from victim, judge, and rescuer to co-creator on the stage of Life. It is about shifting our World View from separate to connected, from competitive to cooperative, from scarcity to abundance, from fear to love. 

A CoCreative Path is path of conscious relationship and co-creation, getting clear about our struggle as well as our need for each other. It is about unraveling our story, healing our hurts, removing our blocks, and co•creating a new story of hope and faith and love…

Filed Under: Reflections, Transformation

From Mindfulness to Heartfulness

April 13, 2025 by admin

My early attempts at meditation were often thwarted by a struggle to empty or focus my very busy mind. I mostly saw it as a personal spiritual practice which never quite landed for me. One book that did inspire me early, was Be Here Now by Ram Das, helping me to understand meditation as an effort to be present to life in the here and now.

In more recent years, I have very much appreciated the contribution of Neuroscience to meditation in the form of Mindfulness. The scientific approach of Mindfulness has helped me to better understand meditation as simply the effort to be present, as “an invitation to come home” from the demands of past and future concerns. I have been inspired by the studies on the affect of mindful awareness on emotional regulation, changes in thought patterns, and modification of behavior.

Today, along with practices that help me to let go of the chatter and to focus my attention, I try to primarily remember to take moments of observation to notice my surroundings and relationships; to notice what I am sensing, thinking, and feeling. Aware by Daniel J. Siegel, MD is a helpful guide for practicing mindfulness.

“When we speak of mindfulness, it is important to keep in mind that we equally mean heartfulness. In fact, in Asian languages, the word for “mind” and the word for “heart” are usually the same. So if you are not hearing or feeling the word heartfulness when you encounter or use the word mindfulness, you are in all likelihood missing its essence” Jon Kabat-Zinn

The movement of mindfulness to heartfulness is a movement toward a deeper connection with self and others, a movement toward increasing Emotional Intelligence. In his book From Mindfulness to Heartness, Stephen Murphy-Shigematsu expounds on several areas of attention to focus the practice of mindfulness on the Journey of the Heart. These areas are Vulnerability, Authenticity, Connectedness, Listening, Acceptance, Gratitude, and Service. 

The journey from mindfulness to heartfulness involves cultivating inner Coherence, the alignment and harmony between the head and heart. The HeartMath Institute has been studying the connection and communication between the heart and brain for over thirty years. Through measurement of heart rate variability, brain waves, and the electromagnetic field, HeartMath has scientifically explored the effect of focusing the breath and positive emotions like appreciation and gratitude.

My experience has confirmed that the practice of coherent breathwork, along with the mindful focus of my attention on gratitude, provides a reliable tool for shifting my internal energy and focusing my life’s direction. I have found that mindful moments throught the day brings me home, and home is where the Heart is. I have come to believe that it is only through the Journey of the Heart that we find the path of personal, relational, and cultural transformation.

Filed Under: HeartFulness, Reflections

We Need Each Other to See

April 13, 2025 by admin

On one level, A CoCreative Path is my reflections on spirituality. From my perspective, that is a Journey of the Heart involving personal and relational transformation, an evolving movement toward greater awareness and harmony. On the relational end, it is a movement from fear based separation and competition toward heart driven connection and cooperation. Deep cooperation and a sense of community is required for fulfillment of human and planetary needs. In any ecosystem, the harmony of cooperation is vital for a thriving environment.

As in any spiritual path, trust (or faith) is required for cooperation to work. Not faith as in some sort of belief in the concept, but a trust that compels us to surrender. In surrender to cooperation, we are called to the center where we offer our perspectives, strengths, and gifts. We also bring our wounds, failings, and confusion. In the center we learn to listen to all the voices, boldly embracing who we are and letting go of our illusion and control.

In the center we learn to see life from multiple perspectives rather than what we see behind our eyes or what we hear from the voices in our mind. We enter the heart of the whole and experience our unity from a place beyond theory.

I believe we are in the midst of a changing collective story. The old story in our culture teaches that we are essentially alone in a hostile environment. It’s a dog eat dog world where only the fittest survive. This runs deep in our collective psyche and has brought us to the edge of destruction. The old story is filled with victims and villains, and has produced all sorts of power and resource imbalances. The inherent fear in the story is the power that drives most of humanity at this time.

I believe that story is a lie!

I believe people are waking up to the light in an unprecedented way. We are identifying many of the problems that we have developed – economic injustices, environmental disasters, and social disconnect. Many of us are also meeting the enemy head on and recognizing that s/he is us. We are growing in self awareness and also self acceptance. We are shifting from a place of judgment to empowerment, with a growing desire to co-create a new collective story. A critical mass can be seen faintly on the horizon.

To further shift our story and learn a new operational paradigm, we need to recover a deep sense of community and embrace a collaborative awareness. It is not enough to return to the unconscious sense of community in the past, along with it’s inherent us/them paradigm. We need to take a quantum leap forward into a collective and integrated whole.

In order to do this, we first need to embrace our individual center, the place in our heart where we know we are valued, loved, and complete – the place where our passion is ignited and our gifts emerge. There we need to cultivate self awareness and clear intention. We need to accept our ego with understanding and compassion, allowing our limiting beliefs, damaged emotions, and trapped energy to dissolve. We also need to explore who we are beyond our story, allowing our passion to burn and our gift to blossom.

We then need to embrace a collective center to fully function individually and together. To navigate the shift in our collective story, we deeply need to see our part in the whole. Like a cell in an organ, we need to embrace the community we are called to function within. And like an organ, our community needs to embrace the function it is called to serve the body.

In that collective center we can learn the art of cooperation and to truly see our need for one another. We learn to see ourselves from a broader perspective, and also experience the harmony and synergy that emerges out of surrender. Like in our personal journey to a heart centered life, we learn to let go of our attachments in order to embrace a deeper sense of who we are. This is foundational to our cooperative work and, again like in our personal journey, it requires letting go of control and embracing the chaos to move deeper into the center.

I believe that it is only with this deeper sense of community and cooperation that we are going to fully awaken and emerge individually. I also believe it is the only place we are going to shift our collective story to pursue harmony and equilibrium, to co-create the world that we know in our heart is possible. 

Filed Under: HeartFulness, Reflections

In Transition

April 12, 2025 by admin

Fifteen years ago I was in a place of transition, a couple years from 60 and contemplating the next chapter of my life. My adult life had taken many  twists and turns over the past 40 years, but had a coherent (to me) thread of continuity and purpose. 

My transition to adulthood was in the late 60’s, identifying completely with the hippie movement and questioning everything about the conditioning I was fed in family, school, and culture. 

In my 20’s I  was influenced by the back to the land movement, became a carpenter, built a house in the country, and started a construction business with a focus on the beginnings of “green” building. I  explored spirituality, was influenced by the teachings of Jesus, and was completely confused by an exploration in Christianity. I got married and had two daughters, 

The next transition and chapter of my life began around 30. My marriage ended and my children became estranged. My spirituality turned to a focus on exploring the affect of my past and healing the damage. I remarried and struggled with blending a family, adding another daughter with mine.

Turning 40 was a major transition, an intentional embrace of a mid-life reboot. We moved to Virginia and spent several years studying at a Mennonite seminary. I participated on the leadership team of a small network of house churches, and started an exploration in intentional community. 

In my mid 50s we took a break from community to regroup. We stepped back in retreat to question everything, and to again reorient our lives. We moved back to our home state of Wisconsin to focus on healing estrangement with my daughters.

So, getting close to 60, I was ready for another major transition into my third thirties. I wanted to put some of the pieces together and focus on combining the primary interests of my life – sustainability and green building, spirituality and personal growth, interpersonal relationships and community. We moved to Asheville, NC., bought land and started plans for a small development of green built homes with a community orientation. 

I also planned a parallel track to write, teach, and coach in the areas that I experienced the most transformation personally and relationally. Developing a small neighborhood took much more energy than I imagined, and I only dabbled in a plan for implementing that aspect of my interests. The primary thing I did do was to take another deep dive into my own growth as I attempted community building among those who bought or rented in Echo Hills Cottages. I also continued to refine my thoughts around what I wanted to share about this most passionate aspect of my journey.

At 70, with three houses left to build, I took a year off to refocus my thoughts and energy for another transition and the next chapter of life. Four years later, as I wrap up the loose ends of developing Echo Hills Cottages, my vision for A CoCreative Path is taking root.

Filed Under: My Story

Circle Culture

April 12, 2025 by admin

“I salute the light within your eyes where the universe dwells – for when you are at that center within you and I am at that place within me, then we shall be as one.” Crazy Horse

Kinship Circles are built on clear intention and agreements. They include every voice and incorporate shared leadership.

The intention of Kinship Circles can be focused in a variety of ways to meet specific needs and interests, and designed to support the being, learning, and doing of our lives. The following are examples of circle focus:

Circle Intention

Starting with the purpose and mission of the circle, alignment of values and expectations are crucial for trust and intimacy. Clear agreements that everyone can affirm are vital to the success of the circle.

  • Men, Women, Couples / Elders
  • Intentional Community
  • Neighborhood / Workplace
  • Spirituality / Personal Growth
  • Healing / Recovery / Grieving
  • Exploring Vision / Mastermind
  • Transitions / Next Chapter
  • Social Change / Organizing
  • Collaborative Projects

As a foundation to conscious agreements, I think The Four Agreements described by don Miguel Ruiz provide a great place to build from. From my perspective, The Four Agreements should be a requirement for Life 101 and certainly a prerequisite for any collective endeavor. The Four Agreements provide the foundation to challenge the agreements of our social conditioning, and to establish new agreements for more conscious and connected relationships.

The Four Agreements

  1. Be impeccable with your word
  2. Don’t take anything personally 
  3. Don’t make assumptions
  4. Always do your best

Built on The Four Agreements, additional agreements can be developed specific to the intention and needs of the circle. Basic agreements include respect and honor, honest and compassionate communication, non-judgment and confidentiality. Foundational agreements for Kinship Circles are as follows.

Heart Circle – Agreements 

The following agreements are adapted from the Heart Circle process in Waking Up – With Everyone Around Us by Tej Steiner.

  • Being Clear Together:  we agree to the purpose of the circle and to support each other in that intention
  • Being Present Together:  we agree to be present and centered in our time together
  • Being Real Together:  we agree to speak our truth with respect and compassion, asking for what we need and offering what we can
  • Being Connected Together: we agree to listen deeply with curiosity and empathy, holding what we hear with respect and confidentiality
  • Being Heart-Directed Together:  We agree to support each other in finding and following what we want and need, giving advice only when asked for or with consent when offered

Way of Council – Intentions

The following four intentions are adapted from the Way of Council developed by the Ojai Foundation. 

  • Listen from the Heart: To listen with full presence, suspending judgment, opinions, and distractions. To witness the speaker’s truth with curiosity and compassion, holding stories with respect and confidentiality.
  • Speak from the Heart: To share your personal truth using “I” statements, sharing feelings and experiences authentically. To take responsibility to ask for what we need and want. To refrain from rescue and advice, trusting the guidance that comes from the circle.
  • Be of Lean Expression: To be concise and brief, focusing on the essence gf what we want to share. To respect time available, allowing space for others and sharing only what truly serves the moment, the circle, and the greater good.
  • Be Spontaneous: To speak what arises in the present moment, rather than rehearsing or planning, trusting that the right words will come to serve the circle and yourself. 

Filed Under: Kinship Circles

Empowerment of Intention

March 15, 2025 by admin

Filed Under: Purpose, Reflections

Awakening the Heart

March 12, 2025 by admin

There is much talk today about being “woke”. The right uses it as a derogatory slur in attack of liberal values. The left embraces the slur as a compliment related to awakening to the systemic injustices in our culture. Although systemic injustice are important to be aware of, awakening is so much more. Like getting out of bed in the morning, awakening is an everyday and ongoing event. 

Awakening begins when we start to question our perceptions of reality,  our worldview – family perspectives, educational conditioning, social norms, religious beliefs, cultural version of history… Awakening continues as we explore our feelings and unmet needs – the internal and relational effect of our past. An awakened life embraces the exploration of the triggers that we react to, the letting go of blame and shame, the consideration of deeper issues than what is on the surface.

Awakening moves us from the biased conditioning of our mind to the authenticity of our heart. It moves from separation to connection, from competition to cooperation, from judgment to empathy,  to the rule of acceptance and compassion.

Awakening opens us to explore the wounds of our past, the losses we experienced, the patterns we developed, the projections of our pain onto others.

I completely embrace the woke culture, only as it questions everything… and moves us from the deception of our conditioning to a fully awakened  heart.

Consider your world view and how it has evolved over time. Consider how you have embraced reevaluating assumption and belief. Consider the joys and difficulting of waking up. Consider areas that still need exploration.

Filed Under: Authenticity, Reflections

Conflict

March 17, 2020 by admin

I have found conflict to be inevitable – with most of us choosing the fight or flight pattern. I have also found that conflict can be transforming if we surrender to it in humility and hope.

Conflict is a vital and healthy part of life. It is where supposedly incompatible perspectives, values, and desires compete for control. It is apparent in both our inner and outer world – internal and relational conflict often overwhelms our lives and the world we live in. Our orientation toward judgment and dysfunctional patterns fuels our fight or flight response.

Conflict is vital for empowerment. Successful collaboration embraces conflict in an attempt to meet the needs of everyone. In the context of awareness, communication, and agreement, conflict can be transfomed  for win/win solutions and co-creative synergy.

Conflict Transformation

The mediation model is designed as a collaborative approach to problem solving. In contrast to the win/lose approach of competition and litigation, mediation moves beyond compromise to craft solutions where everyone’s values are repected and needs are met. The process incorporates conscious communication and participatory decision making principles:

  1. Identify the problem – with respect of everyone’s perspective without evaluation
  2. Clarify the issues – with exploration of all aspects
  3. Generate options – with priorities and creative solutions that meet everyone’s need
  4. Negotiate resolution – with clarity of agreement

I find the mediation process to easily be incorporated in conscious communication and is inherent in the process of Sociocracy.

Filed Under: CoCreation, Reflections

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